Chapter 13

Whereas a Chapter 13 rider may suspect a washout, that rider must still fully exit the comfort of his bed/blanky and walk at least 10 paces to his window or computer. His ability to return to the comforts of his bed/blanky depend on the visual confirmation of the existence of ongoing precipitation. This may occur in one of two manners: 1) large and visible splashes in pre-existing puddles in the street (small splashes on the driveway do not count) 2) the existence of a large and ominous blob directly over or threatening the planned route for the day. A light green blob is not enough – this blob must contain traces of red or yellow to relinquish the rider of his responsibility to ride at the full extent of his capabilities and talk trash to fellow riders while doing so.

In the event a rider chooses not to ride when neither of the aforementioned visual confirmations have taken place, he will be subject to one or more penalties during his next appearance at a Chapter 13 group ride:

1) He will selflessly lead out the next Dundee sprint from Lake Cook until the point at which his heart rate is at 99% of max.
2) He will purchase coffee for the entire group.
3) He will offer every five minutes to refill the cups of his fellow riders.
4) He will change the next flat experienced by a rider in the group.

This is a serious policy with serious consequences. Thank you.

First ride will be 10/25. PDL 6:30, 7:00 at the woods.